materialistic copout

i need to write about something positive here, which should be damn easy since today was a really good day; my spirits were high, it felt like i could easily connect to people and the day just seemed to fly by… until i got home that is. that’s when the little things started to bother me, just mundane roommate stuff which really is insignificant, but recently it has seemed to bother me a lot (more than it should). i guess it will be good when i get my own place and i will have nothing to bitch about except my own lack of doing or not doing. any who… something positive… hmmm… work is good, it’s going to be really busy for the next while and i am looking forward this – i just love juggling a million equally important tasks all at once… it’s fun… hmm.. more positive.. hmmm… laughter, love, friendship, passion and hope are positive… hmmm.. what else?… man i need a tv, right now i should be watching tv, not writing or even thinking about this… i need to be told what soda to drink, what beer is popular, and what car i should ‘aspire‘ to drive… (jeff, no pun intended) it makes life so much more simpler when happiness is defined by having these material things or by working your ass off to get them… six months without any exposure to television and radio advertisements has actually indirectly forced me to think about what truly makes me happy… and i think i have it figured out… i just don’t know how to accomplish it quite yet… well wait maybe it’s not the lack of tv, maybe that is just a copout since it is the only thing (well excluding all of my friends, family, and car) i have removed from my old life… hmmm… either way…. i need to get a fucken television and possibly some wheels. yeah… chicks dig cars.

UPDATE 21:31: go figure, this week is tv turnoff week.. geeze…

edgewater casino sucks my asshole

well that was fucken retarded; a casino without a liquor licence and staff with an attitude totally unfounded for a dry establishment. this place was a complete waste of time and was not enjoyable in any way, shape, or form. right from the start it was fucked up… having to buy a twenty dollar voucher to park for free… and then… the hassle inside to cash the voucher at the blackjack table… my god?!?! what happen to giving people the illusion of getting a deal at a casino… like really… i should want to leave my money there and feel right about it… but now… i just want to light the place on fire and kill all the staff…. geeze… what a bad experience… and it’s not even because i lost my twenty dollars… (kuz i would of lost A LOT MORE if i enjoyed the place)… but rather the fact that the casino felt like a fraud.

virtual existence

hey it’s noon… time to get up… i just love rolling over and picking up the powerbook… i swear i am not addicted to the internet… ok maybe i am, since i have not even made/bought a coffee yet, and i know that i am addicted to coffee…. but i guess it is just so easy to be online.. to read what you want – when you want.. to just pick and choose what music you want to listen to, by a simple click and of course, the ability to publish this whilst laying down in bed. sometimes i do wonder what my life would be like if it was taking place 20 or 30 years ago, where i would be in my mid-twenties in the 80s or 70s… if we hold everything else constant, but remove the world wide web and my powerbook(s)… my life could not exist – i would have no career, no blog, no form of instant communication (email, voip), and no source of passive entertainment (tv/movies)…. etc.. and the removal of these things trickle down to every other aspect of my life… no career = no appartment/food… no blog = no personal reflection… no instant communication = no contact with the outside world.. no entertainment = no fun. however, i would still have my coffee addiction… and my great personality… so, off to starbucks i go.

castle of dreams

i read an article in the georgia straight today.. about being young, hip, successful and alone in vancouver… and i think it was written about me. hey wait.. looking out the window at people is sorta like not being alone.. ok nevermind.. on the plus side, i did leave the apartment today – made it all the way over to the new starbucks at safeway and spruced up my morning with a grande americano… shortly after returning home, i thought about going outside.. this idea seemed to reoccur many times today… but go outside and do what? for a walk, play frisbee, tennis, what? so instead i chose to shelter myself by occupying my day discovering some new tunes and by drinking some water out of a refilled evian bottle… (now that’s living on the edge people… is says DO NOT REFILL right on the fucken label, rebels are kool, right?)

so now what? i sit here sharing my thoughts with the world wide web because (my blog has been waking me up in the middle of the night, and gives me these looks that scream out ‘stop neglecting me’ and…) this is now ‘documented stimuli’ which will get me off my fat ass, and goto the beach and make a sand castle – a castle where dreams become reality and refilled bottles of water turn into canned beer.

UPDATE 21:11: my first, very rushed, should not even be released, sorry for the large filesize, hack job of a pseudo-photographic essay, for this blog entry; castle of dreams. [quicktime 320×240 21.8 MB] or just check out the real photographic essay.

walk around the block

so last night, i did end up going for a walk (thanks gerald), and i kinda ended up at the urban well and luckily it was improv nite. it was kool to see a bunch of people just make up jokes on the fly and to watch the different plots build out. it would be fun to do with a bunch of friends, just as it was fun to watch. i also talked to quite a few interesting people, which is what normally happens when one sits at the bar. theories on why people speak at different speeds, selling bootlegs fragrances, the name ‘joey’ and joey potter, living without television, ‘ordering fourteen martinis’, ‘who didn’t cut the limes’, etc, etc, etc. tonight, who knows what’s on the agenda, maybe some cleaning, some cooking, some desperate housewives, some family guy and probably a walk around the block.

bobbing of my head

so i finally got my hands on the new prefuse 73 album, surrounded by silence, and it’s pretty damn good. i am not going to do some extensive, in-depth review like pitchfork does, kuz if i did, i think it would take the joy out of simply enjoying this album. it just makes me want to bob my head around like my neck is made of rubber and stimulates my imagination. on that note, i also went to see the stars, feist, apostle of hustle and montag this past thursday.. which was a good, chill show, and i am pretty sure my head was bobbing then too.

these past two weeks went by pretty quick, which i am guessing is due to the extra long easter weekend i had. allison came over for a visit, in which we toured around most of the GVRD with no real plan or mission. it’s just too bad that i was unable to find bunny ears, like the girl at cobs bread or the crazy clown at stanley park were wearing.

it looks like next weekend ryan is going to come for a visit, which will be good, kuz we haven’t hung out since like october and i want to show him my place and goodness of vancouver. also my mom is gaining greater ability in coming, which will be kool, so she can chill on the beach, climb a (/her) mountain, and start to enjoy the new millennium.

what’s else is new? hmm… well i need to do my taxes, which is going to be extra complicated this year, but i am looking forward to the challenge. i still need to find a dentist and doctor here, and something is telling me to get my bc drivers licence… so i think i am going to do that too, even though i don’t have a car (on this side of the country) and haven’t really driven since november 2004 (excluding the 5 or 6 times, dre made me drive). but for now, i think i am just going to continue to sit here drinking my coffee and bobbing my head.

an ad-hoc entry

so lets all assume that everything is in a cycle… and this cycle is made up of many other cycles and these cycles vary in size and magnitude and all have different characteristics and attributes… every cycle can be linked across cycles and within each cycle there can be an unlimited combination of mini-cycles. lets also assume this doesn’t mean that the same things will occur repetitively and indefinitely, since the journey through a cycle can lead to new cycles which must be, due to assumption one, part of a larger cycle. hey.. now lets assume that we totally transcend ‘the cycle’ and the closest we ever get to it… is through our relationship with the recurring succession of events that are sequences in our lives. and finally lets assume that this entry was only created for the purpose of creating this single entry and that it can only exist if it is part of a cycle.

is this entry even possible?

the floor

ok.. there is something about this picture that is just worth blogging… maybe because it it just looks kool.. or maybe kuz it is the view from the floor that we have all seen… but this floor is different… it is kinda cold… and uncomfortable.. however it shines with a warm feeling… with the colour red.. that gives you hope… and it lets you believe that you are close to the exit… close to something that makes everything a-ok… yet… at the same time, you feel kinda cozy right here on the floor… kuz you know the door is nearby, and even though you really don’t want to be on the floor, it gives you with a feeling of comfort and security despite the fact that you laying in the middle of the floor. either way… this picture rocks… thanks swissmiss!

matter of perception

well it’s getting a bit dark out here.. and it’s kinda cold.. too.. but there are still quite a few people walking by… this will defiantly be a nice place to chill and watch people walk by.. but.. too bad it just not facing the other way.. ohh well… i guess.. that will be the next place.. that will be ‘bigger and better’… it’s all about progress people… step by step… life will get better… and thus far it is true… sure sometimes.. i feel like shit.. and i am like.. what the fuck am i doing… but… for the past week or so.. it has all been so good… it’s all a matter of perception… like being out here in the cold.. i could be all negative if i wanted to be.. but it’s good… i like it… and that’s all that matters. i have my tunes blaring, my hoodie on, and i have feeling inside that is so warm and fuzzy.

urban shine

so today is gorgeous out. it’s sunny, warm, and this city is radiating in every direction. walking around, looking up, with some quality indie canadian music in the background (stars), the sun shining down and reflecting off of the water, while the sail boats coast by, and the mountains look down over all of us… vancouver is such a pretty place. yesterday, dre and i even discovered that we have an ‘unauthorized’ balcony on the roof of our apartment… with a stunning view… and it’s pretty easy to get to… all you have to do is climb through this little window.. and viola… ohh yeah and friday.. we went on a little road trip to the US of A… which was good.. well for the cheap beer, boxed wine, and the indian casino… but for the most part the trip was simply an eye opener.. where i realized how much i enjoy living in the heart of kits… away from big box corporate america, and where the spirit of the city shines just like the sun (or flows like the rain).